Finding Mother Read online

  Nicole had been worried that she would have been booked for overstaying in the car park but was lucky. No ticket. She was able to relax on the drive home, wanting to enjoy the time on her own with Ben. Remembering the lingering kiss on the cliff, she shivered.

  ‘You okay? Not cold are you?’ Ben asked, glancing at her.

  ‘No, I’m good, thanks.’ She smiled at him.

  He nodded. A few minutes passed and he cleared his throat.

  ‘I’m sorry about what happened to you yesterday, your ankle. How about if I take you out to dinner tomorrow night? Make amends?’ He grinned.

  ‘Thanks, I’d like that.’ She felt her stomach flip-flop. At last!

  They drew up outside the house and Ben strode round to help her out.

  ‘Hey, I can manage! I’m not an invalid, you know.’

  Raising his eyebrows, he took hold of her elbow as she swung her legs out of the car. Grinning at him, she set off to the front door while Ben followed with her rucksack.

  ‘Hello, I’m home!’

  They headed to the kitchen and found Hélène and Eve finishing their breakfast.

  ‘How are you? Ankle better?’ Hélène asked, coming forward to give Nicole a hug.

  ‘It’s not bad, thanks. Just the odd twinge. But I did have free expert medical care!’ Nicole turned and grinned at Ben. ‘I’ve been used to the NHS and forget it’s private health care over here. I presume I won’t be billed?’ She asked, her head tilted to one side.

  ‘Oh, I think I can stand you a freebie. As long as you don’t make a habit of it.’ He smiled before sitting down next to Eve, asking how she was. Apparently better, she was happy to chat to Ben while Hélène made coffee for everyone. Eve demonstrated how well she managed her frame by walking outside, watched on either side by Ben and Nicole, who said, ‘I could have done with a frame like that yesterday!’

  Hélène told Nicole that Adrian had asked to come round and meet Eve after the family lunch.

  ‘He has to earn my seal of approval if he wants to court my daughter,’ Eve said, glaring at Hélène.

  Her daughter’s face dropped.

  Eve snorted. ‘I was joking! But I hope he behaves himself like a gentleman this time or he’ll have me to contend with.’

  ‘Grandmother! Don’t be mean. This is a big day for us, meeting the family for the first time.’ Nicole reached over and touched her grandmother’s arm. She had the grace to look apologetic, mumbling ‘sorry’ to Hélène.

  Ben cleared his throat and stood up. ‘I think it’s time I made tracks to the ferry, Hélène, if you’re ready?’

  ‘Of course. Won’t be long, Mother.’

  Nicole followed them out to the car, where Ben turned and kissed her. On the cheek. ‘I’ll pick you up at seven tomorrow,’ he murmured in her ear, ‘And careful with that ankle!’

  ‘Yes, Doctor. See you later.’ Nicole grinned.

  ***

  Hélène was thoughtful as she drove home again. On an emotional level, anxiety and hope were vying for space. Anxiety about Karen’s reaction to her and hope that at least Michael would accept her as his father’s new partner. She saw this lunch as a test that she wanted – needed – to pass. Adrian hadn’t said that he’d give her up if Karen insisted he did, but her fear of rejection was still close to the surface. Negotiating the many bends that led home, Hélène reflected on the recent upheaval in what had been, until then, a fairly boring life. The only excitement had been her love affair with Adrian and that had ended badly. She sighed. She’d lost both him and her child and been reconciled to being a childless spinster. Not a happy prospect, but realistic. Then Nicole had appeared, bringing love and hope with her. She smiled at the thought of her vibrant daughter who shared her eyes but was much more outgoing and confident than she’d ever be. The young woman who’d not only brought herself into her life, but had been instrumental in reuniting her with Adrian.

  Come on, woman, get a grip! Stay calm and know that you’re loved and it will be all right.

  With that thought whirling around, Hélène pulled in to the drive and went to see if Nicole was ready to leave.

  ***

  Nicole, dressed in cropped jeans, a red T-shirt and matching sneakers, slid into the passenger seat.

  ‘You like nice, Hélène. Green suits you.’

  Hélène, wearing a green stripy top and a white skirt, turned and smiled.

  ‘Thank you. I love the bright summer colours, don’t you? Helps you to feel more cheerful.’

  ‘Guess we both need to feel good seeing as we’re the potential “Spectres at the Feast”.’ Nicole saw Hélène turn pale and reached out to touch her arm. ‘Hey, it’ll be all right. They can’t eat us, you know! And whatever they think of us is their problem. We’ll still have each other.’

  Hélène gave her a quick, grateful-looking smile.

  ‘Thanks. That means a lot to me. I’ve been so worried that if his children really take against me that Adrian will…’

  ‘No, I know what you were going to say, but he won’t. He loves you, anyone can see that. And remember this lunch is going to be much harder for him. He’s the one who betrayed their mother, in their eyes at least. Although he did stay with her and they must give him brownie points for that.’ She took a deep breath. ‘Whereas you…lost both of us. So don’t feel bad on their behalf.’

  Hélène glanced towards her with a whispered ‘Thank you.’

  Nicole stroked her arm again before looking ahead. If truth be told, she was feeling as nervous as Hélène, but was determined not to show it. Acting confident was something she was good at. Very good.

  The car park at Crabby Jacks was filling up fast. Getting out of the car Hélène pointed out Adrian’s car. Nicole linked arms and, smiling broadly, led her towards the entrance.

  ‘Hélène! Nicole! Over here.’ Adrian waved at them from an outside table in a quiet corner, set for six plus a high chair. Three pairs of eyes swivelled towards them as Nicole steered Hélène forwards.

  Nicole swept a brief glance over the woman and two men staring at them. Karen, unsmiling, turned her head away, giving her attention to the little boy in a high chair. Mm, not a good start. Now which is…

  ‘Let me introduce you all. Hélène and Nicole, this is my son Michael, son-in-law Dave, daughter Karen and my grandson Luke.’ Adrian’s arms waved towards the seated figures.

  Michael, a younger version of Adrian, tall with thick brown hair, smiled and stood up to shake their hands. Dave, shorter with fair, cropped hair and wearing a serious expression, also stood to shake hands. Not bad so far, Nicole thought, turning towards Karen. She was met with barely disguised hostility, a look encompassing both herself and Hélène. Determined not to let it get to her, she reached out her hand, but Karen ignored it, turning back to Luke. Uh, huh. So that’s how she’s going to be. Looks like goodbye sister, Nicole felt a pang. She’d always wanted a sister…

  There was an uneasy silence.

  Adrian coughed and ushered the two women into seats opposite Michael and Dave, placing himself opposite Karen. Nicole saw Hélène’s face drop and squeezed her arm. At least Adrian was sat on Hélène’s other side for support, Nicole comforted herself.

  Adrian asked what everyone wanted to drink and motioned a passing waiter to take the order. No-one seemed to want to begin a conversation so Nicole took a deep breath and plunged in.

  ‘This must feel as weird for all of you as it does for me. I’ve never been the family skeleton in a cupboard before and, I admit, it’s not a nice feeling.’ She looked around the table, making eye contact with all but Karen, who still insisted on looking at her son.

  Michael was the first to speak.

  ‘It does feel weird, you’re right. Until a few days ago I…we didn’t know you existed. But it’s not your fault, so don’t feel bad.’

  Dave looked as if he’d prefer to be anywhere but here, trying not to look at his wife.

  Adrian spoke
next. ‘I want to make it clear to all of you,’ he let his gaze settle on Karen for a moment before he went on, ‘that I love Hélène and I… gave her up reluctantly many years ago.’

  Hélène started and he gripped her hand. Luke seemed fascinated by the sight of his grandfather, smiling broadly at him. Adrian smiled back. He then continued, ‘And I don’t intend to lose her again. This time I want to give our…relationship a chance.’

  Again it was Michael who spoke.

  ‘Dad’s right. I haven’t seen him look so happy since…I can’t remember. I always knew he and Mum weren’t getting on and often wondered why he didn’t leave her.’

  There was an audible gasp from Karen.

  ‘How can you say such a thing?’

  ‘Because it’s true. She…she was pretty horrible to him at times but he hung in there and nursed her through that horrible cancer.’ He looked from Adrian to Hélène. ‘If he’s found love again then I’m happy for him. What happened in the past is the past. We need to get over it.’

  Hélène threw Michael a warm smile.

  ‘Thank you, Michael. I appreciate your understanding.’

  The focus shifted to Karen, who must have felt the gaze of several eyes upon her, for she lifted her head and mumbled ‘I’m not as ready to forgive as my brother is. But I can hardly stand in Dad’s way if he wants to take up with…with her again.’ The look she gave Hélène was chilly.

  Adrian looked less confident as he said, ‘And there’s Nicole, my…daughter. I’d like her to play a part in my future too.’ Nicole smiled at him and his face cleared.

  Before anyone could reply the drinks arrived and were handed around.

  Dave, after a brief glance at his wife, looked at Hélène and said, ‘I never met Carol so have no feelings about what happened in the past. But I do know how hard this is for Karen as she was very close to her mother.’ He reached for his wife’s hand before continuing, ‘However, I agree with Michael that if Adrian’s happy that’s okay by me. And as Nicole is an innocent party then she should be accepted as such.’

  ‘Thank you, Dave. That’s very good of you,’ Adrian said. He looked round the table before adding, ‘Now, I think it’s about time we looked at the menu and ordered some food. Agreed?’

  The menus were picked up with what, to Nicole, seemed a collective sigh of relief. She felt the tension still palpable around the table and she admitted to herself that it wasn’t panning out the way she’d hoped. Realistically, she couldn’t have expected to be welcomed with open arms, but after all, these were her siblings. All were innocent parties as both Dave and Michael had pointed out. Karen was the stumbling block, for acceptance of both her and Hélène. She couldn’t see that they could ever be one big happy family. But, as she sipped her wine, she asked herself if she actually needed that. She had two lots of parents and that should be enough for anyone, right? She sighed, not sure about that.

  Glancing across at Michael she saw he was studying her intently.

  ‘It was good of you to speak up on our behalf, Michael. Thanks. I’d like us to be friends if that’s possible.’

  ‘Sure, why not? I’m more relaxed about it than my sister. My other sister,’ he grinned.

  ‘Great! So, what sort of work do you do?’

  ‘I’m an administrator for a Trust company. Bit boring but it pays well,’ he took a sip of beer. ‘What about you?’

  Nicole told him about her television work and he plied her with questions, showing a keen interest in what she did. For a moment Nicole was able to forget why they were all there, enjoying the company of someone her own age.

  The food arrived, providing a temporary break in the conversations. Looking around Nicole noticed that Hélène was chatting to Dave while Adrian and Karen fussed over Luke. As everyone started to eat Nicole stole a quick look at Karen. A big woman without the height to carry it off, she had scraped her hair back in an unflattering pony tail. Mm, doesn’t look as if she cares about how she looks. Is she that unhappy? She certainly looks uptight as she hasn’t stopped frowning. Could just be because of us, I suppose. Nicole looked over at Luke, a smiling little boy who possessed his father’s fair hair and blue eyes, and whose face was now smeared with tomato sauce from his pasta. She would love to get to know him but realised it wouldn’t happen yet.

  Michael must have noticed her gazing at the others as he leaned forward, whispering, ‘Families, eh?’

  ‘I guess. Mine was very small, no siblings or cousins. Only elderly aunts and grandparents who died years ago. Quite boring, actually.’

  Michael checked that the others were deep in conversation before continuing.

  ‘Well, I’d settle for boring any day if it meant no rows or tears. I’m for the quiet life, me.’

  ‘Don’t you want to marry and have a family one day?’

  He shook his head.

  ‘I’m not that keen. Happy to be the bachelor boy who can please himself. I’ve got my own flat in Town and a good social life. What more could a chap want?’ He spread his hands and grinned. ‘What about you? I understand you’re married but you’ve split up?’

  Nicole swept her hand through her hair and sighed.

  ‘Yes, it looks as if we’ll be getting a divorce. But it hasn’t put me off marriage. I’ll just be more choosy next time.’ As she tackled her steak, Nicole thought about Michael. He seemed nice enough, not very deep, but she could live with that. At least he didn’t seem the type to make waves. Unlike Karen…

  ‘Have you lined up a replacement yet?’

  Nicole nearly choked on her steak. ‘Certainly not! It’s far too soon. Why do you ask?’

  ‘Oh, I’ve got a couple of mates who’d love to be introduced to my gorgeous sister,’ he grinned.

  ‘No thanks. I’m happy to be single at the moment. But thank you for the offer.’ She felt rattled. Michael had only been trying to help, but it hadn’t felt right. Perhaps because she did have someone in mind, but couldn’t admit it. Lost in thought, she continued to eat her steak in peace while Michael and Dave settled into a chat about what sounded like a local racing car event on the beach. Not her thing at all.

  By the time desserts and coffees were ordered and, helped no doubt by the effect of the alcohol, everyone seemed a little more at ease. Dave and Michael changed places so that Dave could talk to Nicole.

  ‘How are coping with meeting us? Not been easy, has it?’ Dave asked her.

  ‘No, it hasn’t. Not surprising, I guess. I…I’m sorry that Karen feels the way she does. Is there anything I can do to help her accept me?’

  ‘Not yet. She’s best left to come round in her own time. However long it takes,’ he shrugged. His face portrayed the look of a man who had learnt the hard way to let his wife make up her own mind.

  They chatted long enough for Nicole to discover that underneath his seriousness there lurked a sense of humour. He was even happy to poke fun at his profession, acknowledging that lawyers were perceived to be a “necessary evil”.

  Adrian brought the meal to an end by announcing that he was off to settle the bill, his treat. The others protested, but he was adamant. ‘I suggested that we all came here as I wanted my family to meet each other. So it’s only right that I pay.’ His eyes swept over the table, pausing as he came to Karen, cleaning Luke’s face. ‘I’d like to think that the ice has been broken and that we can meet again.’

  Michael murmured, ‘I don’t see why not.’

  Adrian smiled at him before adding, ‘Hélène and I are going away shortly,’ Karen’s head swivelled round, her eyes wide in surprise. ‘And perhaps we could have a meal together at my house when we return.’

  Karen cried out, ‘Going away? It’s a bit soon, isn’t it?’

  Her father said gently, ‘I’ve wasted too much time all ready, Karen. My new motto is to live in the present.’ He walked off to the bar.

  Hélène moved into Adrian’s vacated chair and leaned across to Karen.
/>   ‘I know this has been very hard for you, Karen. It’s not been easy for me either,’ she said earnestly. Taking a deep breath, she went on, ‘What happened between your father and me over thirty-five years ago may not have been right morally, but we genuinely loved each other and that can never be wrong – ’

  ‘Of course it’s wrong if someone’s married! How dare you try to excuse yourself. What you did was horrible and a…a sin. You hurt my mother and I don’t think I’ll ever forgive either of you!’ Karen burst out, red in the face.

  Hélène blanched. ‘I’m so very sorry for what happened to your mother and you quite rightly honour her memory. But I…I had to give up my child, who I loved from the moment I first saw her.’ Reaching out for Nicole’s hand, she went on, ‘If you can’t forgive me that’s fine. But can’t you at least acknowledge Nicole, your half-sister and, as your husband said, is innocent…’

  Karen stood up, looking as if she were fighting some inner battle. Her mouth opened as if she were about to speak but nothing came out. Dave touched her arm but she shrugged it off and strode towards the building and straight into an emerging Adrian’s arms.

  chapter 27

  They were drinking tea in the garden when the doorbell rang. Hélène returned with Adrian, bearing a huge bouquet of flowers.

  ‘Mother, this is my…my friend Adrian.’

  Adrian smiled at Eve as he handed her the flowers. ‘I’m very pleased to meet you at last Mrs Ferbrache. I understand that you like pink roses.’

  Eve nodded her thanks and asked Nicole to put them in water. Then she studied this man who had had such an impact on her daughter. Hmm, not bad I suppose. At least he has some manners.

  ‘Good afternoon, Adrian. I may call you that, may I?’ He nodded. ‘Good. Well, I’m also pleased to meet you. Won’t you sit down?’

  Hélène poured tea for Adrian and Nicole returned, sliding into her chair.

  Eve looked from her daughter to Adrian and noticed Hélène’s eyes brighten as she handed him the cup. His answering look spoke equal volumes. So, they are in love, she thought, a small smile playing around her mouth. I do hope they can sort out the problem with his daughter – his other daughter. From what Hélène said she behaved quite rudely at lunch. That will be for Adrian to sort out, but I don’t want to see Hélène hurt again.