Finding Mother Read online

  On Friday morning Nicole jumped out of bed, a broad smile on her face. Not only was the trip to Herm the next day, but Adrian had phoned last night to tell Hélène that his children had agreed to meet them for Sunday lunch. They were going to a west coast restaurant and Karen would be bringing Luke. Her sort-of nephew, Nicole thought, smiling to herself as she showered. As an only child she’d missed out on so much, but as part of this new family, Nicole hoped that she could at last experience the joys of siblings. Assuming they liked each other. Drying her hair, she couldn’t help thinking that Karen might not be very keen on her, after what Adrian had said about her closeness to Carol. Ah, well time would tell…

  ***

  Nicole looked surprised to find both women in the kitchen

  ‘No breakfast in bed, Grandmother? You must be feeling better!’

  Eve smiled. ‘Yes, I am. Those pills that the doctor insists I take seem to be having an effect. Thought I’d see if I can manage with this today,’ she tapped the Zimmer frame next to her chair. ‘I need to get these old legs of mine working again before it’s too late. Perhaps you’d see me into the garden after breakfast? Hélène’s going out.’

  When they had finished eating, Eve pulled herself up on her frame and took unsteady steps towards the back door. Nicole hovered by her side, looking anxious

  With a sigh of relief, Eve lowered herself onto a chair on the patio.

  ‘Oh dear me, I’m really out of condition, aren’t I? Perhaps I need one of those treadmill things to get fit!’ She gave Nicole a wan smile.

  ‘I think you’re doing great. We’ll soon have you running up and down the hall,’ Nicole grinned. ‘Can I get you anything? Rug, cushions, water?’

  ‘I’d love some water, please. Then I’d like you to sit with me for a while if you haven’t anything better to do.’

  ‘Of course I’ll sit with you. Back in a mo.’

  A few minutes later Nicole returned with a jug of water and two glasses.

  ‘I thought you might like us to continue our chat about the past,’ Eve said, after taking a sip.

  ‘Great, as long as it doesn’t tire you.’

  Eve waved her hand. ‘If I get tired I’ll stop, don’t worry. Now, where were we?’

  ‘You were telling me about the dances.’

  ‘Ah, yes. We always looked forward to them. But there were other ways to enjoy ourselves. We were entitled to a day off each week and quite often we’d catch a bus into Exeter for a bit of shopping. It wasn’t easy to buy new clothes with the few Clothing Coupons allowed, so we’d buy material and one of the girls, Clare, sewed dresses and skirts for us. Sometimes the material was old curtaining which we bought from the market.’ Eve paused for another sip. ‘I still remember a lovely dark green velvet skirt that Clare made for me. I wore it to a Christmas dance in the village, matching it with a scarlet jumper and earrings like miniature Christmas trees I made from tinsel. Everyone remarked how Christmassy I looked.’ She chuckled at the memory. They had walked arm in arm into the hall, the girls sparkly and shining in their bright clothes. ‘We wove ivy and tinsel in our hair for extra colour.’ Eve remembered Philip coming up, grabbing her hand and whirling her round the room. She’d felt intoxicated with excitement, and from then on Philip called her his “Christmas fairy”.

  Nicole seemed to notice her far-away look.

  ‘So, was Philip there to admire your new outfit?’ She grinned.

  Eve sipped her water. ‘Oh, yes he was there,’ she replied, before telling Nicole what he had called her, provoking a giggle from her granddaughter.

  Eve continued.

  ‘We didn’t just shop on our days off. Sometimes we’d go to a film matinee. I loved dramas starring my favourite actors, John Mills or Michael Redgrave, or comedies when I needed a laugh. After long, hard hours in the fields we were glad to sit in the cinema and forget there was a war on. I loved George Formby with his ukulele and cheeky songs.’ Eve smiled to herself as she recalled sitting in the back of the cinema laughing at George Formby’s antics one afternoon. Not with the girls, but with Philip. It had been one of their rare afternoons together and such fun. After the film he’d taken her to the nearby café for afternoon tea and they’d even had time to call into a pub for a glass of cider. She felt completely spoiled. And loved.

  Eve became aware of Nicole’s intense gaze and gave herself a mental shake.

  ‘How long did you stay on the farm, Grandmother?’

  ‘Until the end of the war. I couldn’t return to Guernsey and there was nowhere else to go. As volunteers we were free to leave when we wished and two girls did go home after a couple of years. Conscripted girls arrived to replace them. Clare stayed on with me, having been orphaned in the Blitz and with no other family. We had friends in the village and became fond of our bosses, Mr and Mrs Coombe. They treated us like family. Their only son John was away fighting so we were his replacement. Both as workers and as “children.” Eve sipped more water. ‘When John finally returned, he announced that he wanted nothing more to do with farming and planned to go to university. It was the right decision for him but his parents took it hard. A lot of the young men who’d left farms wanted more from life after being away fighting so long. It’s one of the reasons Land Girls were still needed after the war ended.’

  ‘So you could have stayed on the farm?’

  ‘Yes, I could. But I wanted…needed to get back to Guernsey. Although I hadn’t exactly missed my parents,’ Eve said, pulling a face, ‘But I hadn’t got any reason to stay in England.’

  ‘What about Philip? Weren’t you still friends?’

  Eve felt her eyes water. She said softly, ‘No. His…his plane was shot down on 20th April on the last bombing raid against Berlin. He…he didn’t survive.’

  ***

  Hélène returned later that morning, after visiting the care home offering respite care. Impressed by both the accommodation and the staff she was anxious to confirm her mother’s stay.

  Eve sat by the window in her sitting room, gazing out to the garden.

  ‘How did you manage with the frame, Mother?’

  ‘Quite well, thank you. I had a little walk in the garden with Nicole before coming in for a rest.’ She peered at Hélène. ‘Did you go to that home?’

  ‘Yes, and it was lovely. I’m sure they’ll look after you very well. They’ve got a vacancy in a couple of weeks but need to know today if we want it.’ She took a deep breath, mentally crossing her fingers. ‘Shall I book it, Mother? Are you happy – ’

  ‘Yes, yes, go ahead, dear. I haven’t changed my mind. You deserve to have a holiday. Is that man of yours joining you?’ Eve smiled at her bemused daughter.

  ‘Mm, yes he is.’ She gave Eve a hug, feeling enormous relief. Adrian could go ahead and book the ferry to St Malo and start looking for places to stay. Her stomach fluttered at the thought.

  ‘I’ll ring them now, Mother. Back in a minute.’

  ***

  After her daughter left, Eve was alone again with her thoughts. It had been an eventful morning, what with using the frame again after weeks in that blessed wheelchair, nearly confessing all to Nicole and now agreeing to respite care. But it felt good and Eve was happy to see her daughter smile again. She would do all she could to encourage Hélène’s relationship with Adrian. There was a lot of pleasure to be had in playing matchmaker, she thought, thinking also of Nicole and Ben. Closing her eyes she drifted off to sleep.

  ***

  Nicole felt pleased with her efforts in the garden. The beds were beginning to look healthier with the flowers and shrubs finally outnumbering the weeds. It had been hot, sticky work but worth it as she wanted to do something for her grandmother. As they had walked slowly in the garden earlier, it had been apparent how much Eve loved it, hating to see it so unkempt. She had pointed out her favourite flowers, even remembering when they’d been planted.

  ‘We planted that pink rose bush when your mother was born. We’d
not long moved in and the garden was a mess. Hadn’t been touched for years, so Reg set about digging the soil over ready for planting. He’d always had a fondness for roses so they took pride of place.’ Pointing to a vivid display of purple and pink hollyhocks, Eve continued, ‘But they’re my favourites. So majestic against the hedges, aren’t they? Although I have to say that the perfume of the roses is hard to beat.’

  It wasn’t long before Eve became tired and Nicole walked by her side back into her sitting-room, offering to cut some roses for her. She made up a vase of the pink ones and placed them next to Eve’s chair, the heady scent soon filling the room. Nicole returned to the garden and the weeding.

  As she worked Nicole recalled the pain in Eve’s eyes as she mentioned Philip’s death. He’d obviously meant a lot to her, she thought, tugging at a particularly intransigent specimen. No more had been said and a moment later Eve had suggested a walk in the garden. As Eve shuffled along Nicole asked about Reg and how they’d met.

  ‘We’d known each other before the war as he owned a small neighbouring farm. He was older than me and, to be honest, I’d not paid him much attention. But he seemed to have a soft spot for me and would bring me flowers from his garden.’ Eve paused and leant on her frame. She could picture Reg in his battered corduroys and patched-up Guernsey sweater, clutching a small posy of freesias as he hopped from foot to foot on the door step. His brown eyes used to crinkle up as he smiled and he was a kind, gentle man. Not cut out to be a farmer, but he’d inherited it from his parents and knew nothing else. Eve’s parents had encouraged Reg to court Eve, seeing the possibilities from the joining of the two farms. Their son had made it clear he wasn’t keen on marrying and it would have kept the farm in the family for the future.

  They had reckoned without Eve, who wanted more from life than to be tied down to life as a farmer’s wife. Particularly on Reg’s small farm. And she hadn’t been attracted to him. Not then.

  ‘So, what happened after the war? Did you and Reg become an item?’ Nicole grinned.

  ‘I suppose so. He’d waited for me for five years, hadn’t courted anyone else. Or so he said.’ Eve pointed to the house. ‘This place was up for sale. It had been taken over by the Germans and was in a terrible state. The real owner had left Guernsey before the war and couldn’t be traced, so the States put it on the market at a rock-bottom price. Reg loved it, saw the potential for building greenhouses for growing, which is what he’d always wanted to do, and sold his farm. We …we had some savings and got the builders in. The wedding took place at the same time.’ Eve recalled those frantic weeks as she’d been pulled along by Reg’s enthusiasm, not only for her as his wife, but for their new home and business. It hadn’t been easy and there had been times when, alone, she had shed tears for what might have been. But over time Eve had come to accept her new life and her husband and, looking back, saw it hadn’t been a bad life. Not really.

  chapter 25

  Nicole parked in the ten-hour parking section of White Rock, before heading off to the Trident ticket office. Although only eight o’clock the sun felt warm on her face as she stood in the queue. She hadn’t expected to see many people waiting at that time of the morning, but it looked like Herm was popular that day. Groups of parents, burdened with rucksacks and beach bags, shepherded young children clutching the ubiquitous buckets and spades. Mixed in the queue were several older couples and the occasional singleton like herself. Mm, guess those lucky enough to have been out clubbing last night will be catching a later ferry.

  Clutching her ticket, she moved off with the others to wait by the steps for embarkation. Stepping aboard the gently bobbing boat, Nicole felt a thrill of excitement. In about twenty minutes she would be landing on Herm and, hopefully, into Ben’s arms. Pulling on a cotton sweater as protection from the sea breeze, she climbed up to the top deck. The ferry had eaten up the passengers with room to spare and Nicole found herself a vantage point from which to mark their three mile journey.

  She was glad of her sweater as the ferry steered its way past the harbour entrance and out to sea, into the embrace of a strong breeze. Gazing back towards St Peter Port Nicole had the traitorous thought that the waterfront was more attractive than that of St Helier. Boats large and small bobbed up and down on their moorings, forming a colourful display in front of the picturesque frontage of shops and restaurants. The harbour itself was guarded by the old, battered Castle Cornet, a relic from the thirteenth century according to her guide book. Nicole had been reading up on Guernsey, keen to know more about the island to which she was so strongly connected. Turning towards Herm, she saw its tiny neighbour, Jethou, like a small off-shoot to the right and, further out to sea, the larger island of Sark. A heat haze shrouded the islands giving them an air of mystery and separateness; the same air which prompted thousands of people to travel back year after year. Fortunately, not all at the same time.

  Of all the islands, Herm captured her imagination the most. According to legend it had not only been the home of Neolithic man, monks, smugglers and a Prussian Prince (all true), but also of ghosts and fairies (not confirmed!). What could be more romantic, she thought, as the tiny harbour came into view. She identified the large white building off to the right as the appropriately named White House Hotel. Beyond the harbour to the left stretched a sandy beach scattered with rocks and guarded by boats drifting at anchor.

  The harbour wall came ever closer. Nicole’s eyes swept over the people queuing alongside a tractor and trailer, from which cases and bags were being unloaded. She tried to pick out Ben. Ah, there he was! Standing to one side, hand shading his eyes as he searched the ferry for her. A simultaneous wave of their hands made them both laugh.

  ‘Morning. Have a good trip?’ Ben welcomed her as she jumped onto the breakwater. This was followed by a quick kiss as they sidestepped the other passengers pushing past.

  ‘Fine, thanks. And what a gorgeous day! Can’t wait to start exploring.’ Nicole replied, anticipation of the day ahead causing her pulse to race.

  ‘There’s loads of time. Thought we could start by having breakfast at The Mermaid,’ he waved his arm towards a clutch of buildings off to the left. ‘The others will be down later after their lie-in.’ He took her hand and headed off past the Harbour Office. It appeared that other day trippers had the same idea about breakfast as a small group followed them past the shops and into the courtyard of The Mermaid. Ben found them a table before going off to order the food.

  The sun slanted in through the neighbouring trees, highlighting tiny specks of midges and dust motes dancing in the air. The excited chatter of visitors continuing on their way past the pub died down leaving the courtyard in peace. Nicole closed her eyes, happy to be still for a moment.

  ‘Don’t tell me you’ve fallen asleep already! Doesn’t bode well for the hectic day I’ve planned.’ Ben grinned at her, lowering a tray onto the table. Nicole’s eyes shot open.

  ‘Just enjoying the atmosphere. Don’t worry, I’ll be up for anything after a refuel.’

  Ben laid out the coffees, juice and toast and they tucked in.

  ‘Seriously, I thought you might enjoy a mixture of relaxing on the beach and walking round the island. As it’s only a mile and a half long that won’t take much time, but there’s lots to explore and, of course we’ll need to stop for lunch. Can’t let your blood sugar get too low, can we?’

  ‘No, Doctor, we can’t.’ Nicole sent him a cheeky smile before adding, ‘Where will we have lunch?’

  ‘Nick suggested The Ship, which has a great seafood menu. Will be quieter there too as it gets busy here once the day trippers start piling in. I thought we could explore first to work up an appetite and then head off to the beach this afternoon. Sound ok to you?’

  ‘Very okay, thanks.’

  Ben reached out and touched her hand. ‘If you enjoy yourself today, we could always come back on our own sometime.’

  ‘Sounds good. I’m sure –’

  ‘
Here we are! Hope we’re not interrupting anything?’

  Nicole looked up to see a tall, lanky man grinning down at them, accompanied by what she deemed a loved-up couple holding hands.

  ‘Jonathan! Let me introduce you to Nicole, the friend I was telling you about. Nicole, Jonathan. He’s another saddo like me, a doctor so devoted to his patients that he doesn’t have time to meet lovely ladies like you!’

  Nicole laughed as she shook Jonathan’s outstretched hand.

  ‘And here’s our happy couple, Jeanne and Nick. They were married in Herm last year and are now expecting Mauger junior.’

  Jeanne, grinning broadly, slid onto the bench opposite, Nick joining her. After a flurry of greetings, Jonathan went in search of coffee. Nicole liked what she saw of Ben’s friends. Jeanne’s smile was warm, spreading to the bright blue eyes framed by long dark hair. Her bump was barely noticeable under a loose T-shirt. She guessed that Nick looked close to forty, his dark brown hair flecked with grey and the lines around his eyes crinkled as he smiled. His deeply-tanned face was that of a man who spent most of his time outdoors. As his arm closed protectively around Jeanne, Nicole felt a momentary pang of envy. Not because she fancied Nick, attractive as he was, but because Jeanne looked as happy and content as she wanted to be. Glancing towards Ben, she caught him looking at her with a speculative look and her stomach flipped. Perhaps I just need to be patient…